Zero to Heroine! 26 leading ladies of Disney ranked from most pathetic to most empowering.

As you've probably guessed by now, I. LOVE. Disney. ESPECIALLY the women of Disney. Some of them are pretty annoying and forgettable and let's face it, pathetic. But others are just plain badass. 

For an A Level project last year, I wrote a 3,000 word essay on Disney's representation of women and it's really clear that over time since Disney's first leading lady, Snow White, in 1937, princesses are represented more as a "strong independent woman" figure in recent years, as opposed to a ditzy damsel in distress who waits passively for a prince to come and kiss her...

On that note, let's see who's at the bottom of our badass Disney lady scale...

26 + 25. Snow White and Aurora

Now these two ladies are the definition of "Disney princess". However, despite how well-known they are, they're not very ballsy are they? Imagine Snow White and the Seven Dwarves if Snow White could fend for herself - she wouldn't collapse in forests crying, she wouldn't need to live with seven men, and she wouldn't be stupid enough to eat an apple off some crazy and creepy old lady so that she has to be saved by her prince. And as for Aurora, well, she doesn't really do a lot, and when she does she spikes her finger and dies, and once again, has to be saved. So, at the bottom of the pack are these two.

24. Lady

Again, doesn't really fend for herself very much. Only reason she's above Snow White and Aurora is because dogs are quite feisty.

23. Wendy

She had potential to be awesome - but followed Peter like a little puppy.

22. Maid Marian

Again, she's just a bit... Meh.

21. Cinderella

Cinderella is one of the most badass out of the traditional Disney princesses despite being fairly low - she does run away from the Prince at the ball and she does have a lot of optimism.

20. Alice

Still very ditzy but she taught us it was amazing to live in a dream world.

19. Rapunzel 

I do feel quite bad for putting her this low... But in my opinion, there's a lot more badass leading ladies than poor Rapunzel. But she does have those frying pan techniques AND runs away from her "mother".

18. Lilo

One of the only ladies not to end up with a man (even though she is like 12). Little Lilo is disobedient, sassy and will stop at nothing to get what she wants!

17. Ariel

Hannah, if you're reading this, please don't kill me. To be honest, the only reason she got this far was because of the second film, when she becomes a really cool mum. But in the first film, she gives up her voice to be with a man and (again) falls for a creepy purple woman's words. 

16. Esmeralda

Words aren't even needed for this one. Just look at that picture. Look at that tambourine. Queen. of. Sass.

15. Jasmine

Two words - Pet. Tiger.

14. Elizabeth Swann

Our first live action leading lady! Bet you all forgot about her! She goes from a posh little rich girl to a swashbuckling pirate in three films. Can't really get more feisty than that.

13. Anna

Anna is a fearless optimist - she always looks at the good side of things and people AND she travels in the ice to save her sister and then forgives her when she freezes her heart. 

12. Belle

Again, I feel quite bad for putting one of my favourites so low. But it's Belle's time. She's shown as one of the first intelligent Disney princesses and she doesn't judge her men on looks. 

11. Tiana

Just short of the top ten is the leading lady of "The Princess and the Frog". She is intent on achieving her dreams of owning her own restaurant (obviously the new age princess dream).

10. Jessie

Disney's biggest tomboy. She's a feisty redhead who doesn't have a love interest until the third film - I'm afraid that's what let you down!

9. Megara

Again, no words are needed, just a picture defining what Meg stands for.

8. Nala

She's queen of the lions. Duh?

7. Jane

She's not afraid to make a fool of herself - and that first encounter with Tarzan just sums her up.

6. Elastigirl/Helen Parr

She is a mum. Who is also a superhero.

5. Mary Poppins

Practically perfect in every way. And she's flying via umbrella.

4. Pocahontas 

She's my favourite Disney princess. She's a bit of a daredevil, and that hair is just flawless.

3. Merida

Okay, so the whole idea of Brave was to show an empowering young princess. And she certainly did the job. She puts her family first, she has no love interest AND she's fabulous with a bow and arrow!

2. Mulan 

Just missing out on the top spot is Mulan - she pretends to be a man in order to follow her dreams. You can't get any more gutsy than that... Or can you? Number one is...

1. Queen Elsa 


Okay, so I know this is a little cliche, but after a lot of deliberation, I really think Elsa is the most empowering Disney female. Not only is she a fabulous ice queen who runs away from her palace, it appears she has no interest in a man to look after her, and "Let it Go" is one of the most empowering songs of all time..

So there we have it. Hope you enjoyed my little countdown. Might do a villain one next time... Hmm...

Celebrity Big Brother 2015: Goodbye, Alicia!

Alicia Douvall
A glamour model who has had WAY too much plastic surgery and has only just learnt her alphabet...

So, Alicia was the second housemate to be voted out. To be honest, I am a little bit surprised as Nadia was the odds-on favourite to be evicted, but then again, Alicia's time came.

Nobody likes a follower. Alicia latched onto Perez after him and Katie Hopkins had loads of arguments, and when Alicia tried to argue with her, it was quite embarrassing and awkward to watch.

And she definitely didn't help herself when she told Katie Hopkins (of all people) that she only feeds her children vegetables and that she homeschools her children, and is teaching herself at the time. "I only learned my alphabet and shapes last year"

ARE YOU FOR REAL.

I did think at some points that the public might vote for her as it appeared that the other girls in the house were ganging up on her - but meh. Obviously not.

So yeah, there's not a lot I can say about Alicia - she's just a bit boring. She did absolutely nothing for me - I think if I was in the house with her, I'd avoid her as much as I could. She does seem nice, but all of our conversations would be awkward and uncomfortable.

On we go, and Alicia's presence in the house will inevitably be forgotten immediately.

Walt Disney World Resort: "The Great Movie Ride"

Good afternoon! I must say I am VERY excited at this news that I have just seen today.

Now, if you have been to Orlando, and in particular Walt Disney World, then I very much hope that you are familiar with the amazingness that is "The Great Movie Ride".

If you have been to Walt Disney World and are sat there thinking "The Great Movie what?", be ashamed. If you've never been, then you're forgiven, because.. well that's just fair enough. It's not everyone's cup of tea.

Anyway, just a quick summary of what it actually is. "The Great Movie Ride" is the ride through the greatest movies of all time - pretty self explanatory. However, if you think you're just going to be sat there on a moving vehicle watching different clips of movies, think again. You will be accompanied by a tour guide as you delve into dazzling film sets, and experience audio-animatronic figures who look scarily like the best known actors of all time. So, that's pretty much it. Bright lights, big stars, legendary films that you're bound to recognise (think Casablanca, Tarzan, Mary Poppins, Alien, Indiana Jones and my personal highlight of the ride, The Wizard of Oz) and a tour guide who is practically awesome. And to top it all off, you literally feel like you're in a movie as the ride becomes a show and you watch your tour guide being involved in a gun fight and then having your vehicle being taken over by a vicious gangster (where else would any of this sound sane if it wasn't Disney World?) 

However, the best part of the whole ride is the film montage at the end of the ride. 

Tour Guide: "Here's a look at some of my personal favourites..."

Sit back, relax and enjoy some of the most famous movie clips of ALL time. 

So Disney have just announced that they have teamed up with Turner Classic Movies to change and update the ride. I LOVE this ride, and it's my favourite thing in the whole of America, but if anything it is a little bit outdated. With all the Disney World updates being made e.g. Avatar Land in Animal Kingdom, the Frozen expansion in Epcot, Star Wars Land rumours etc., it would look very old. But maybe that's what makes it so traditional. I am excited for the updates, but I don't want it to be ruined. My heart would break into a thousand pieces.

Let's hope they include references to recent blockbusters e.g. Harry Potter, Titanic, Avatar or maybe as it's in Disney World, maybe we can get a glimpse of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, The Lion King... the list goes on.

Bring on Spring 2015. Disney will be announcing more details of the update soon. But in the meantime, if you haven't experienced The Great Movie Ride (and I feel sorry for you), here's a complete journey through... It's quite long but just skip through. Trust me, it's worth seeing, especially if you're a fellow film buff.  

Disney's "Into the Woods" - REVIEW (SPOILERS!)

OUT NOW!
Based on: "Into the Woods" by Stephen Sondheim
Director: Rob Marshall
Distributor: Walt Disney Pictures

Starring: Meryl Streep, Emily Blunt, James Corden, Anna Kendrick, Chris Pine, Tracey Ullman, Christine Baranski, Johnny Depp, Lilla Crawford, Daniel Huttlestone, Mackenzie Mauzy, Billy Magnussen, Tammy Blanchard, Lucy Punch, Annette Crosbie and Frances de la Tour


Words cannot describe how excited I have been for this film ever since I heard that DISNEY was releasing a film that COMBINES FAIRY TALES. I was sold. Now, being completely honest, I was not at all familiar with the Stephen Sondheim musical before it, I had heard a couple of songs but knew nothing of the storyline. I just knew it was a musical, it had an all star cast, and it sounded like the type of film that I wasn't going to forget.

I won't forget it for sure, but possibly for the wrong reasons.

So the basic outline of the story; in a fictional fairy tale setting, the Baker (played by the Gavin and Stacey star James Corden) and his wife (the wonderful Emily Blunt, of The Devil Wears Prada) are desperate for a child. However, it turns out that the local witch (the legend that is Queen Meryl Streep) has cursed the Baker's family and in order to break it so they can have a child, they must collect a number of objects before (you guessed it) MIDNIGHT. So off they trot, collecting a number of objects from favourite fairy tale characters whilst belting out some relatively forgettable musical numbers. 

So we have the combinations of the traditional Grimm fairy tales of Little Red Riding Hood played by the brilliant child actress Lilla Crawford, fresh from the Broadway revival of Annie and Mr Johnny Depp as the Big Bad Wolf. I was particularly disappointed with this bit and the part that Johnny Depp played. For such an amazing, powerful actor, he was in the film for about 5 minutes, if that. It was such a good character portrayal, I wanted to see more of it! Poor Johnny. 

Next was Jack and the Beanstalk. Jack was played by Daniel Huttlestone, best known for smoving audiences as Gavroche in the film adaptation of Les Miserables. Despite his portrayal of Jack not being as great as Gavroche, it was still a great performance, as well as his mother, who was played by Tracey Ullman.

And finally, my favourite section of the whole film was the Cinderella part. As one of my favourite fictional characters of all time, Anna Kendrick and Chris Pine played Cinders and her vain, thick prince perfectly. Cinderella's song on the steps as she deliberates whether to run away from her prince or whether to stay with him was my personal highlight of the whole film (as well as Queen Meryl obviously).

As well as all of these, Rapunzel (Mackenzie Mauzy) and her prince (Billy Magnussen) were part of the Witch's storyline, and this was probably the most moving. The Witch has held Rapunzel in a tall tower to keep her protected from the world below. Rapunzel has obviously come of age, and wants to run off with the Prince, much to the Witch's anger. Meryl's powerful musical number in this section was great - another musical highlight.

So to put it bluntly (and avoiding giving too much away), the Baker and his wife manage to collect all the items, the Baker's wife magically becomes pregnant and the Witch is no longer and old and ugly witch but a stylish FABULOUS one. But this happy ending doesn't last for long, and that's when the film begins to get a bit strange, as it becomes less Disney and more traditional Grimm brothers. As the woods get darker and as the characters avoid being squished by the Giantess (Frances de la Tour), there are unexpected deaths and the film ends on a very weird note. However, as I said, I am very unfamiliar with the plot of the play so this is why I had no clue what was going on. 

The actors made the film for me; Emily Blunt stole the film with her Golden Globe nominated performance of the Baker's Wife and need I say more about the one and only Meryl, who has bagged herself yet another Oscar nomination for playing The Witch. The one actor that particularly surprised me was James Corden. I've always been a bit unsure of this man - he was amazing in Gavin and Stacey and ever since then, I've just imagined him as Smithy in everything I see him in (and we can't deny it, he's been in EVERYTHING) but as the titular character in Into the Woods, he was a great actor AND singer (who knew?) and I would have loved for him to be nominated for something this year!

So overall, the more and more I think about it, Into the Woods is a very special film. The storyline of the original Sondheim musical is unique and extremely Disney-esque, but in a certain way, it's not - it's much darker than any other Disney fairy tale movie, and it has a much more grown up feel to it. The all star cast didn't disappoint, the production design, the special effects, the costumes and the make-up were all excellent and I will most definitely be rooting for it at this year's Oscars. However, the thing I love most about musicals is the catchy, upbeat songs that I can't wait to download as soon as I come out of the cinema - Into the Woods didn't quite do that for me. Despite this, I will most definitely be watching it again. I mean, where else would I find all of my favourite childhood stories combined into one film with Queen Meryl Streep and King Johnny Depp? 

Celebrity Big Brother 2015: The ejected, the rejected and Alexander O'Neal

Not everyone will agree with me on this I know, but Celebrity Big Brother makes my year. Maybe I just get perks from watching people argue and a general tense atmosphere...

This year is proving to be one of the BEST but most ANNOYING series' of all time - thank you, Perez Hilton. You are as annoying as you are entertaining, and maybe I will learn to tolerate you... One day.

Seeing as I've only just got into all this blog biz, I just wanted to write about my opinions on the people that have left so far - two people were ejected IN THE SAME WEEK for offensive and inappropriate behaviour, one left and one was actually evicted normally by the public...

Jeremy Jackson

Some bloke that was a child actor in Baywatch and has done absolutely nothing since.

Okay, so was it just me that thought this guy was just a little bit shifty right from the launch show? As Perez Hilton OBVIOUSLY knew, apparently Jeremy had just broken up with his long-term wife and was going through a lot of issues. Tip no.1 Jeremy, don't go into the Big Brother house, and Tip no.2, don't drink LOTS on the 3 nights that you were actually in there.

So as most people that watch the programme or read the Sun newspaper probably know, Jeremy got a little bit too drunk one night and ended up "groping" or "undoing the dressing gown" of fellow housemate Chloe Goodman. 

Now, it's difficult to have an opinion on this - we couldn't see anything so we don't know what actually went down. But, what matters is - it got him kicked out and apparently, rumour has it, a police caution. So must of been pretty bad. He's since claimed on This Morning that he unreleased her dressing gown as he was "interested in the style of it". Who am I to judge? Maybe it's lies, maybe it's not. Whatever, I think it was right for Big Brother to kick Jeremy out, purely because I think he's a bit mentally unstable right now and it probably didn't do him any good.

Ken Morley

I've never heard of him but apparently he's pretty famous for Coronation Street, but is now better known for being a bit old-fashioned.

Definitely one of the most controversial housemates this series. When he entered during the launch show, I was a bit unsure. Either, this man is going to be hilarious and will go all the way, or he's  a little bit odd. I should have been certain of the second one.

Yes, ok, he was hilarious sometimes and did make the show worth watching, but some of the things he said just make you think "KEN, HOW CAN YOU BE SUCH AN IDIOT?!"

So fans of the show will know that Ken was very old-fashioned with his choice of words and approach to other housemates, so he thought it was okay to use racist terms in conversation with Alexander O'Neal and to use extremely sexist and creepy language when speaking about the women of the house.

"Some of the best asses I've ever seen in the world here" as he looked at them in the shower.

So to be honest with you, I'm a bit unsure about Ken; I don't think he meant anything in a nasty way - I don't think he's racist, homophobic, or sexist, I just think he's a little bit silly to go on TV and say these things. Personally, I think it was a stupid tactic to get himself out of the house.

I think it was wrong for the other housemates to isolate him and say he was difficult to live with, because as Keith Chegwin says, when he's on his own, he just does his own thing. And I think if he wasn't ejected, Ken just might have won it - the isolated always do e.g. Gary Busey, Jim Davidson.

Chloe Goodman

Thought she was a bit annoying on Ex on the Beach, apparently she's a Cheryl Cole look-a-like (I don't see it) and she's been a bum double for Cameron Diaz (eesh)

Now, it's obviously an unpopular opinion as she was the first to be voted out but I actually quite liked Chloe. Yes she was a little bit annoying and she didn't really do much, but I like people who I believe to be real in there, and I think Chloe, despite looking a little bit fake, had her heart in the right place and was friendly to her other housemates. I know that if I was in Big Brother I would probably get on Chloe - she seems like a laugh, she's kind, she's a good listener, but she's just a little bit annoying and that's why she was voted out.

She had a rough time in that house (e.g. the Jeremy dressing gown incident) and just, Perez. That is all that needs to be said. 

We probably won't here from her much again, maybe a fitness DVD or another series of Ex on the Beach but for me, she wasn't that bad to watch. Well done, Chloe! I leave you with the Chloe boob bounce.

Alexander O'Neal

80's soul singer.. You know that song that's like... YOU'VE JUST CLOSED YOUR MIND OOOOH OOOOOOH

Alexander was a great man, and he would of gone a long way. But it looked like the pain that is Perez pushed him to the limit. He has since said that he left the house as he was worried he wouldn't be able to stop himself from hitting Perez and just the general stress of the house (we don't blame him). Any fans of the show will know how tough it looks.

Yes, he said the f word when addressing Perez and it may have been a panicked and scared exit but he's not a nasty man. Alexander was simply a legend. He was kind, he was funny, he had a great accent and quite simply, he was the coolest and smoothest person in that house. 

He will be missed in that house, clearly seen by Katie Hopkins' outburst at Perez as the news was announced. All hail the legend that is Alexander. 

And on we go. 11 housemates remain, and we've got 15 more days of fun and games, in which this irritation of a human being will inevitably be crowned the winner:-

A little bit about me...

So, there I am. Thought I'd make my first (well, technically my second) post about me - just a little bit of background info.

• In case you weren't 100% sure, my name is Matt. Short for Matthew.
• I'm British.
• I don't really have a lot of hobbies; if you know me well, you know I'm a typical lazy teenager, who loves lying around on my sofa/bed literally doing nothing. 

Still nothing particularly interesting/different about me, I know.. Let's see if I can think of one... Erm...

• I used to be a ballroom dancer and have a silver medal and plaque for both Ballroom and Latin.
• I was a rugby player for a little bit when I was younger. Definitely an odd transition from a rugby player to a ballroom dancer, but hey that's me...
• I am a homosexual.This definitely makes me different from a lot of people, but hey it's life. It's not a choice, you've got to deal with it, embrace it and be proud of who you are. 

Still nothing REALLY that interesting...

Well I'm hoping a lot of people will agree with the things that I love; I love all things Disney related (I'm a tad obsessed), Harry Potter, Glee and American Horror Story. I'm a massive fan of America, especially Florida and New York, and as everyone does, I. LOVE. FOOD.

So, from my first post, we can establish that I am really not that interesting a person. But, so what? I'm just an ordinary person who's a little little little bit quirky and just wants someone to read my opinions, whether it's agreed or disagreed.

Why else would I have a blog? 

Love Matt

x

And here we go...

Well, hello there. I'm really not sure if anyone's going to read this, but I thought I'd get into this blog thing. I've got a lot to say for myself about things that a lot of people hate but I like it. And I'm pretty sure that's what a blog is?

So lo and behold, as I will be writing my opinions on all things Disney, all things to do with celebrities (mainly Celebrity Big Brother), film reviews and basically, anything I feel strongly about, including latest news issues. (Bearing in mind, I'm not the sharpest knife in the block so I might say silly things. But hey, that's just me).

So sit back and relax as I take you through the mind of Matt until I get bored of writing a blog (probably very soon).